Lentil Me This

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Right.  So.  I just got my bill for the renewal of my domain name and web hosting space.  It reminded me that it’s been two years since I first started this project.  (It has also served as a tangible reminder that maintaining my blog does in fact require a small financial investment!)   I felt a pang of disappointed because when I started stickafourchetteinit two years ago, I was overflowing with enthusiasm, energy and ideas, and I never got the content off and running as I’d hoped.  And maybe I won’t this time either, but I’m giving it another go, because, well, why the stickafo not.

It’s summer – in a BIG way.  The temperatures have consistently been in the 90s, the cicadas are out singing and the rosé spends 20 pre-open minutes in the freezer to get the just the right chill.  This all obviously leads our collective culinary penchants to converge on a common subjet… SALAD!  As a compliment to a BBQ, or as a main dish on its own, the summer salad offers endless possibilities for cold fresh food!  And who doesn’t love cold and fresh in this heat!?

So – here’s a recipe for a hearty, flavorful and filling lentil salad that I’ve used both as a side and as a main dish.  Cooking the lentils does require some heat – I usually do them in the evening.  I don’t serve this salad totally cold – if I make it made ahead of time, I remove it from the fridge about an hour before serving.

Crunchy Lentil Salad

A totally not boring way to love a lentil.

Crunchy Lentil Salad

1 cup green lentils

5 cups water

1 bay leaf

1 stock of celery finely chopped

1 medium/large carrot finely chopped

1/4 cup finely shopped red onion

2 tbsp. finely chopped parsley

1/4 cup olive oil

2 tbsp. lemon juice

1 garlic clove pressed

1/4 teaspoon dried thyme

1/4 teaspoon ground cumin

Salt and freshly ground black pepper

Cook the lentils in the 5 cups of water (with the bay leaf) for about 15 minutes – they should still be crunchy.  While the lentils are cooking chop the carrot, celery, onion and parsley. Drain the lentils (I allow them to sit in the colander for a couple of minutes) and remove the bay leaf. Transfer the cooked lentils to a serving bowl, add chopped veggies and mix well.

Make the dressing by mixing together the olive oil, lemon juice, spices and pressed garlic clove.  Add salt and pepper to taste. Pour dressing into the lentils/veggies and mix all together. 

Serve slightly chilled in summer, at room temperature in colder months.

Stick A Fourchette In It – ‘Cause You’re Done!

Quick as Brunch Scall-yinz Pancakes

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Brunch: the green light meal on the weekend to mix and match anything you want to eat in one meal without worrying about the service order.  Pain-au-chocolat treat with an espresso to start, sure that makes sense, because it’s basically breakfast.  Followed immediately by cheese “en aperitif”,  then a green salad with carrot ginger dressing.  Why, yes, totally ok, we’re now at lunch!  And maybe a coupe of champagne during the meal, because hey, this is brunch, so why the f not!

If I ever get back to posting regularly, there will be a lot of brunch entries, because it’s easily my favorite meal to prepare and to eat.

So here’s a good one to start: Savory Scallion Pancakes.  Totally easy, totally fast, and a big hit among kids and adults alike.  As a lil’ shout-out to my Pittsburgher sister and her fam, I’ll call them Savory Scall-yinz Pancakes.  Because yinz is gonna like ’em.

I also have to admit that I snagged this recipe from Gwyneth’s cookbook (don’t judge me), and actually didn’t tweak it much because it’s pretty good as is.

Fry for about 3 minutes on each side

Fry for about 3 minutes on each side

Drizzle with some tamari !

Drizzle with some tamari !

 

Savory Scall-yinz Pancakes

1 cup spelt flour

1/4 cup brown rice flour

1 1/4 cups ice water

1 tablespoon grilled sesame seed oil

1 to 1 1/2 cups of thinly sliced scallions

Pinch of sea salt

Oil for frying (I’ve used canola and olive… the canola seems to turn out the best pancakes)

In a large bowl combine the flours and the ice water and whisk to get a nice looking batter with no lumps.  Add the sesame seed oil and incorporate the scallions.

Heat a large pan for frying and cover the bottom lightly with a layer of cooking oil.  I use my iron pan for this and it’s the bomb (even if I don’t have the Eiffel Tower handle version).  Really, totally and completely worth the investment.

There are a couple of ways to fry these babies.  I tend to make smaller pancakes as opposed to one big pancake for each person.  I find most people have a hard time committing to “bigger”, and experiment more easily with little portions.  And let’s be honest, it takes a leap of faith to accept pancakes based around something from the onion family.  I use my 1/4 measuring cup and make batches of 3 small pancakes at a time, frying lightly on each side for 2-5 minutes depending on the heat of the pan. Between each batch I add a bit more oil so the bottom of the pan is covered very lightly.

Sprinkle with some salt, or drizzle with a bit of tamari and serve warm!

Stick a Fourchette in It, ‘Cause You’re Done!

 

 

Inception Stock (Veggie)

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Much of my inspiration for recipes comes from the couple of cook books I’ve purchased (or have been gifted), and loooots comes from the internet.  Or as we tech savvy people call it, the World Wide Web.

I’m constantly amazed by the sheer amounts of information available on this W.W.W. in the tap of a few keys.  I often find myself doing searches on a particular ingredient, or ingredients, and going through recipes until I find one that:

  • A) sounds good
  • B) isn’t too processed foodie
  • C) doesn’t take three days to make
  • D) contains things I either have in the pantry/fridge, or can substitute for easily enough.

Most of the time within about 5 recipes I stumble onto something. 

One thing however that particularly irks me when vetting a recipe is when doing the mental check for ingredients: “check, check, check, yes, YES AND YES : BOOYA, this is totally happening tonight !”,

only to stumble on the buzz killer:

2 cups (insert ingredient), SEE PAGE 67.

This is bad news.  If ingredient called for on PAGE 67 is included on ANOTHER PAGE, usually because it needs ANOTHER PAGE to explain how to make it.  That’s where we hide recipes that actually do take three days and more often than not involve various cooking processes that can’t be done in a scrape-it-together weeknight meal: blanching, freezing, chilling, simmer for 45 minutes, etc.

I feel like this technique should be called inception recipe-ing, and I also feel like it should not be allowed.  Because unlike for Ellen and Leo, time does not actually move more slowly when we’re a layer in.  The “let soak overnight” actually does take THE WHOLE NIGHT.  45 minutes of unanticipated prep work, will take that, and probably more (enter whiny children, a phone call or two, an annoying work email,  and other minor distractions).

The point of all of this: I scoffed and scoffed until I realized that I was planning to post a recipe… that…. wait for it….calls for the stock made on page 67.  So I’m going to talk to you about inception stock, but I’m also going to give you the solution so that it really is inception stock: when you get to the second layer, you’ll bend the time/space continuum.

Freeze it!  Like in the freezer!  Make it on the weekend, pop in freezer bags and you’ve just layered in to save a good hour.  My editor Nini totally crinkled her nose at this idea.  “No way” she said.  “Trop compliqué.”  And I think she turned around and actually walked away.  I totally understand this response, and once upon a time would have thought the same thing. 

But really, try it – just once.  Make this on a weekend, when you have an hour around the house and you can get this going in the background: read your book, watch a movie, do housework, go for a run and have someone else keep an eye on the goods.  Make yourself freeze a couple of ziplocks and email me when you use this on a crazy Tuesday night to put together a quick as lightning soup. 

It’s easy.  And so much healthier than the industrialized veggie cubes that are a quick fix for flavoring  soups, sauteed veggies, pasta, etc.

This actually works with any number of combination of veggies and herbs.  Choose the ones you like best!

Inception Stock

Just incepted an hour of prep time!

 

Inception Stock

12 cups of water

1 medium to large carrot, peeled and chopped into large chunks

1 large onion, peeled and cut into large quarters

1 stalk celery including the leaves, chopped into large chunks

2 cloves of garlic peeled crushed open (like with the side of a knife) but not minced

1 handful parsley leaves roughly chopped

1 bay leaf

Sometimes I add a handful of cilantro leaves if I have them on hand

I’ve also been known to add some kale leaves.

1 teaspoon large sea salt

1 teaspoon freshly ground pepper

Once your veggies are peeled, rinsed and chopped, add everything to a large pot.  Bring to a rolling boil, stir everything and turn back the heat to simmer for 45 minutes to an hour.  I usually cover the pot at this point and cut back the heat to low, just to maintain the simmer.  This is when you can go back to your book, take a nap, do some housework, go for a run, etc.

After an hour or so, remove from heat.  Let cool and strain the liquid.  For the remaining solids, sometimes the kids will eat the carrots and cooked onion as they come out of the pot.  I’ve also been known to throw all the solids in the blender to make a purée that I can sneak into mashed potatoes or pasta.  (The purée itself isn’t great, but when combined can add some nice flavor.)

Then distribute the liquid into ziplock bags, usually about 4 cups of stock per bag.  A nice trick I learned here: freeze the liquid flat in the bag and it defrosts much more quickly.  (Total aside: do we say more quickly or quicker?  Popular opinion on the internet seems to be divided!)

I shall now consider that I can make guilt-free reference to this recipe in other recipes in the near and far future.  You have been warned!

You Can’t Stick a Fourchette in This One (obviously!), but You’re Done!

 

 

Goes Down Smoothie

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Navigating the ins and outs of healthy eating with kids is tricky.  It’s hard to explain to a 7 year old exactly why some of the foodstuff she loves are totally ok: apples, grapes, tomatoes, salad, lentils etc. but others, like Coke, are total shit.  “But Moooooooom, it tastes SO good, and I feel FINE after I drink it.  Really, I don’t think it’s so bad for me, I don’t even feel sick!” 

To try and clarify which things are which,  we use two categories for things we like: “tastes good /good for you” and “tastes good /not so good for you”.  The latter category is reserved for treats and exceptions and the former is mostly open bar (sadly, the real bar beverages fall into the tastes good/not so good for you category, so no open bar at the real bar. Grrrrrrrrr.)

So.  Fruit juice.  An alternative to soda, more fun than water… many people categorize this as a tastes good/good for you option.  This would be seem to be a logical conclusion because it’s derived from fruit, a real, whole food.  I’m not convinced; here’s the low down.

Lots of fruit juice is loaded with extra sugar, and other additives to preserve its shelf life at the grocery store.  Often the extra sugar is added in the form of high fructose corn syrup.  And just to no that.  But even if it’s not the really evil kind of added sugar, any kind of refined sugar isn’t a good idea.

Suppose you buy 100% organic juice: totally safe, yes?  Hmmmmm, not so sure.  The 100% organic stuff is definitely better than the mega processed aforementioned kind, but it’s still processed.  While there are still some of the vitamins in the juice of the fruit, many of the other important nutrients found in the whole fruit are eliminated; fiber, for example.  And even if the sugar is naturally occurring so not technically a processed food, you can certainly drink lots more “sugar” in the juice shortcut than if you have to eat 10 oranges to get the equivalent quantity.

I don’t mean to say that juice is BAD.  But it’s not a replacement or an equivalent for whole fruits that have a natural nutrient/vitamin balance.  I don’t offer it to the kids on a regular basis. I guess I would put it in the good/not so good for you category.  That same category where I put my wine.  As much as I would like to, I can’t credibly convince myself that I’m drinking it for the grapes.

Wait, whaaaa?!  No more juice?  Little Jimmie loves juice!  He’s going to flip a lid if I cut back. 

I hear ‘ya.  Here’s a good alternative for a fruity beverage treat, because seriously, who doesn’t like a smoothie.  (Use the 2 banana version in the beginning, the extra sweetness is appreciated by the young-inz.)  And the added veggies are a bonus!  The whole Fam gets on board for this one.

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Going Down Smoothie

4 cups raw spinach leaves

1 cup other greens (I used kale)

Cold water (as needed)

1 apple washed and chopped into large chunks

1 pear washed and chopped into large chunks

I banana, peeled

Small bunch of cilantro

Juice from one lemon

Start by making the green base: put the spinach, kale and water in the blender.  If you have a serious blender like a Vitamix, I’m totally jealous and you should invite me over to use it.  Just kidding.  Serious blender owners won’t need much water.  The rest of us have to add water and push the greens down until the mixture “takes”.  This will vary.

After you’re set on the green base, put the blender on high, and add the fruit so it mixes in with your base.  If you want to up the sweetness factor, add another banana.

Last step: the herbs (cilantro in my case) and the lemon juice are added last.

Serve cold.  Preferably in fancy glasses.  All things taste better in fancy glasses.

You Can’t Stick a Fourchette in This One (obviously!), but You’re Done!

 

Crazy is as Crazy Does

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IMG_0297IMG_0293We started the kids’ swimming class on Wednesday night, and I’d forgotten that 20+ children in any space can totally be a crazy-inducing experience, but 20+ kids in a space with an echo and full of water, can only be described as fresh hell.  I was of course running late, thus became that person who parks in the no parking zone to get the kids inside and changed on time (I’ll come move the car as soon as they’re in their class, no evil eyes pleeeeeease!) only to realize I’d forgotten Mister Mister’s trunks, and had to run barefoot back outside to aforementioned badly parked car with naked Mister Mister in my arms to find his cotton underwear (he had a diaper on because he hasn’t quite mastered the potty yet) because once he’d seen the pool, getting dressed without getting in the pool was NOT an option.  The other parents and kids who had finished the previous class and were filtering out to the parking lot mostly stared at the hot mess that was Mister Mister and I screaming and running to the car, the contents of our bag strewn across the tiny changing room…  Sweet Yummy pretended she didn’t know us and calmly went to her class.  Then Mister Mister, suited up in his cotton underwear, ran out of my arms and jumps head first into the pool.  Everyone turned around to see who the owner of the crazy kid was, and it was me, looking totally the part with various pieces of clothing and towels in my hands, dirty (now muddied) feet from running barefoot through the dirt to the car, and hair matted to my sweaty forehead.  I checked my phone, and we been at the pool for a total of 7 minutes.  

Needless to say, by the time we arrived home an hour later, I could barely string together a coherent sentence. I had to remind myself why extracurricular actives are so important: they make the monsters tired so they go to bed early, leaving the evening free for a glass (or three) of wine and Orange is the New Black episodes.they develop and hone the physical and creative skills of our youth.

Dinner turned out to be a mix of two dishes I normally have on heavy rotation, one a pasta dish, the other a rice dish.  The mix was because I literally kept forgetting which one I was making and started mixing up the recipes.

So here it is.

Cray-Cray Something

1 tbsp coconut oil

1 large onion

2 cloves garlic

1 knob fresh ginger chopped into small pieces

1 tbsp. turmeric

4 Tbsp. Tamari (additive free soy sauce – also gluten free)  I buy mine at the organic store.

250 ml (8.5 ounces) crushed or puréed tomatoes (JUST tomatoes, nothing else!  Also try organic store for this one if you have doubts)

100 ml coconut milk (careful on this one too, many brands sneak additives in to make the texture consistent.  Non-additive coconut milk has a thick layer on top and the water on the bottom.  That’s normal… equal parts of both translate nicely into the milk when you’re cooking.)

1 block fermented tofu (non GMO, and no unnecessary additives) chopped into cubes

I package Somen noodles

Bunch of cilantro

Salt and pepper to taste

Heat a saucepan on medium heat and add the coconut oil. Once oil is hot, add the chopped onion, and a few minutes later the pressed garlic and the ginger.  Let cook for 10 minutes or so, until the onions are transparent.  Then add the chopped Tofu and cook long enough to brown the sides of the Tofu (5-10 min-ish).  Then add the turmeric.

One mixture is cooked to your liking, add the sauces (tomato and coconut) and 2 tbsp of Tamari.  Let simmer while you make the Somen noodles.  These are my FAVORITE quick dinner noodles because they take THREE minutes to cook.  Literally.  In this recipe it’s even faster because you want them to be a bit al dente.  I cooked about 2.5 min for this recipe.

Cook drain noodles and add them to your saucepan and mix everything together.

Taste and check the salt… if you still need add some more Tamari (2 tbsp) or so.  Mix together so the tastes mix.

Just before serving add pepper and chop the cilantro.

Stick a Fourchette in It, ‘Cause You’re Done!